Seven years old, stealth, and scared

Powerful post on the conversation a mom has with her trans daughter about her concerns about being outed and facing discrimination. A reminder of why we fight for transgender students rights.


stealth2Oh friends, I feel like I’ve really screwed up.

I’ve tried so hard to strike a balance in my parenting, attempting to ensure my child’s safety and privacy  without instilling a sense of shame in her trans identity.  And I think I’ve done pretty well.  She has friends of all ages who are transgender and who are healthy and happy and successful. She even got to meet TV star Laverne Cox, and be told by that beautiful trans woman that “transgender is beautiful.”  I think she believed Ms. Cox.  I think she knows she’s beautiful.  I think she even feels kind of proud to be trans, like she’s part of a special club.

But I still think I’ve missed the mark.  I have been so focused on helping her maintain her privacy, on telling her, again and again, that only SHE gets to decide who “knows,” that I think I’ve…

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About Fairy JerBear

A disabled, trans/agender fairy bear living in the American Southwest and passionate about social justice, the environment, Trans/ LGBTQIA+ equality and combating bullying.
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One Response to Seven years old, stealth, and scared

  1. I remember seeing the pictures of that story. One of the brightest moments from the trans community since I joined it… Such an inspiring mother and daughter. I hope the affirmations on this article will help her to overcome her anxiety about having missed the mark. This is a challenge many people would sooner not rise to at all, even at the expense of their child’s well-being.

    Liked by 1 person

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